Anyone who's ever known me long enough to see me in the morning knows why I find this study on the perils of getting out of bed after a good night's sleep so...well...validating.

A study by scientists at the University of Colorado suggests that the performance of people immediately after waking is as bad as, or worse, than if they were drunk.

Additionally, pretty much anyone who knows me that well will also tell you that I eat the same thing for breakfast every morning (yogurt with granola and hot tea). Partly this is because I've settled on a combination I love. And partly it's because last time I messed with my morning routine (a long time ago), I ended up with milk in my glass and orange juice on my Fruity Pebbles (which really isn't all that bad, if you're really not all that awake). And tales of my crushing inability to actually do anything more complex than locating wayward toothpaste are both legendary and accurate.

In fact, having been both drunk and newly awakened (although rarely both at the same time) and able to make a fair comparison, I would say that I actually do far better under the influence of spirits than under the influence of the dreaded fluffy pillow. Sometimes I wonder if my pajamas aren't impregnated with some kind of mind altering drug that makes the world look and feel like a badly drawn fanfic Simpsons screensaver.

Getting up in the morning is the first, and for many people, the most perilous moment of the day. You can sprain an ankle on the stairs, scald a hand while making tea or be floored in an ungainly tussle with your underwear.

Heh...I resemble that remark.

Drunk...sleepy...drunk...sleepy. You be the judge.